SUP-pli-Mental
The Wheeler’s second SUP excursion took place on the Potomac in Georgetown because the more disgusting the body of water the greater the incentive to stay on the board. In all fairness the Potomac is much better than it was thirty years ago but there is a stigma attached to it. We did notice a lot of what looked like Cinnamon Toast Crunch floating in the river, but I digress.
Three of us started the day with a kickboxing class at UFC in Alexandria because it’s not like we needed our legs for anything later, right? It was a great class and didn’t exhaust us but the sweat was already flowing when we piled in to John’s SUV.
We picked up Lisa who had just arrived fresh from a weekend of relaxation at the manor house in the country. We then took a bit of a tour to pick up Coach Wendie who, in spite of her rather full schedule, agreed to come along and get our rookies started.
We took another tour getting to the Key ridge Boat House and with three women in the backseat it was inevitable that we would hear about all the possible ways we could have gotten there sooner. They were right of course, but that’s cold comfort for three women on foot.
John dropped Wendie, Patricia and I off at the boat house and he and Lisa went in search of parking. We realized afterward that we could have parked in Rosslyn and only had to walk a little farther than we did to where they found parking. The waterfront was quite popular this particular Sunday afternoon.
The operation at the boat house is professional and well-staffed with young people working outside in the summer. This is exactly what young people should do in the summer. Most of the patrons, being Georgetown, were not any older than the staff. DC is full of shiny, new grads pulling down big money as Senior Business Analysts and the cost of this excursion reflected what the market will bear when there is a lot of disposable income floating around.
While in line we heard that everyone in line needs to fill out a waiver and those are on clipboards scattered around various picnic tables. We grabbed a couple and started filling them out. Simple enough but there were a few places to initial that had to be read. For instance we had to acknowledge that if we heard three blasts of a horn from the boathouse we were to return immediately because some sort of emergency like lightning storms or Godzilla attacking was about to happen.
The check-in was smooth. One of us needed to have a driver’s license and as usual one of me did. You don’t pay until you get back, which makes sense since you don’t know how long you’ll be out. We also rented 2 water-tight dry bags big enough for a cell phone and wallet and maybe keys but also a locker for Wendie’s backpack and our shoes. In hindsight the locker would have been enough since we didn’t take our cellphones with us.
We decided since we were on the clock that we wouldn’t wait for John and Lisa. The line had grown and right about the time we made that decision they came in from their long trek from the car. We explained what to do and what we were doing and ambled off towards the water.
We walked in to the nook that has all the life vests which are adjustable and all are adjusted to fit the skinny twenty-somethings that flock to the boathouse. After a bit of adjustment on a few of them I found one I could fasten. I felt ridiculous but safe. We stowed our gear in the locker and locked it using the provided lock and walked to the next staging area.
A staff member reminded us of the rules, the main one being that we are required to keep our life vests on at all times on the water. I could see a number of people on the water with open vests or no vests so it’s not strictly enforced but wearing one seems a small price to pay, even if just to keep part of you out of the Potomac.
Now began the most painful part of our journey. The deck and the dock are made from weathered, pressure treated lumber that has been painted at some point. Reddish brown paint still covers parts of it in direct sunlight. We had stowed our footwear in the locker so the three of us were barefoot. Being the tough guys we are none of us wanted to be the first to complain but we all started to try walking on our heels or find shade or somewhere water had splashed. The bridge threw a shadow over the far end of the dock and most barefoot folks congregated there.
There is no need to lug the boards yourself at this place. The attendants are strong and know their business. It was busy enough that there were plenty of boards in the water already so we didn’t have to wait. The attendant asked each of us if we’d done this before and we said we had but he was still good about explaining how to mount the board from the dock and to stay on our knees when we’re close in to prevent head injuries. These boards have leashes and they attach it to your dominant foot. Ironically I’m right handed but left leg dominant and Patricia is the opposite.
The attendant adjusted our (proper sized this time) paddles for us. It speaks volumes about Wendie’s humility and respect for people doing their jobs that she didn’t mention that she’s an instructor and races these things. I’d probably show up in a body suit covered in sponsorship patches if I were her but then I’d likely spend most of the time in the water because Karma is like that. Anyway, as always we were glad to have Wendie with us.
Once we were on the boards I could immediately tell the difference from the ones we used at Occoquan. These were smaller, 11’4” boards that were sleeker and faster but also not as stable. Patricia had a different board that looked like a Nimitz-class aircraft carrier in comparison. A bit broader and flatter across the top.
I practiced my up and down drills a few times before committing to stand. The river current and the breeze makes the Potomac choppy compared to where we were before so I had to remind myself that the board will stay upright so all I have to do is stay perpendicular to the board and the water. I did have to drop and recover a few times because I felt like I was too off balance. There’s a certain rhythm to the river and, as everyone at Kazaxe knows, I’m not a dancer so getting off rhythm made me feel too unstable. I wasn’t in imminent danger of falling but it was easier to drop down and start again.
I knew I would get used to the feel of this board in time and it started to feel easier after ten minutes. Wendie had gone up river and I was surprised how quickly I was able to cover the distance between me and her. The river current was probably flowing in that direction but the boards are faster than the others we tried.
By now John and Lisa were at the dock so Wendie went to meet them. Patricia and I stood around for a few minutes while they got situated and people-watched. One SUP’r was laying in repose on his board, just getting some sun. It was hot but as long as we were moving the breeze was comfortable. I did find being less stable made me less inclined to turn my body or even my head to look at anything. I had most conversations staring ahead like a sentinel.
My other distraction was foot related. My feet did burn and the soles were sore which made me want to shift my feet from time to time and that’s not recommended. When I was on my knees the soles of my feet were exposed to the sun and that hurt over time. Paddling some river water over them helped.
Wendie was holding court with her new subjects under the Key Bridge. Patricia and I paddled over to see how they were doing and Lisa kept asking, “It gets easier, right?” By now I was feeling more comfortable standing and absorbing the nuances of the river so I said it does get easier.
It was fun to hear Wendie give the instructions and she did it exactly the way she did with us. They moved quickly through the lessons and then they were up on their feet. They were practicing the transitions when John’s foot slipped and he went straight down, feet first, into the river. He came up smiling but we noticed the river had dissolved his hat. A shame to have lost it but John takes these things in stride. Wendie was encouraging him and John seemed quite comfortable floating with his board, no worse for the wear. Now Wendie had an opportunity to teach us how to get back on their board in deep water, something we hadn’t learned before.
The trick, it seems, is to pull your body across the board at its balance point. Start by gripping the handle in the middle and pull yourself up and then as soon as you are far enough out of the water ease the rest of your body onto the board. It’s not as easy as it sounds, especially on these narrow boards. The board does try to flip and like everything else in SUP, it’s a balancing act. Eventually Wendie helped John by putting her weight on the opposite side of the board while he climbed on. I decided that if we ever do this in a Lake or clean pond we will need to practice this move. As it was the heat was starting to intensify and we were all a bit jealous of how refreshed John looked.
It was time for Wendie to go so I followed her to the dock so she could get her gear and then give me the key to the locker. I couldn’t keep up with her but I made a good effort and it only meant I didn’t need to wait long at the dock for her to bring the key.
My legs were starting to tire as I paddled back to the group. The leg work out from the morning notwithstanding, the constant motion of the river will wear down your leg muscles. Your legs act as shock absorbers and even on a relatively flat road shocks will eventually wear out. So I spent most of the rest of our time transitioning between knees and feet.
We decided to go a bit farther up river and it was this time that Lisa made it to standing. She came along with us for a little while before transitioning back to siting and was rightly proud of herself. It makes it easier to imagine doing it again and progressing next time. John didn’t try to stand again but not out of concern (other than more clothes dissolving in the Potomac), he knows he can do it and he will next time.
It was time for our challenge. We were all thirsty beyond measure and dreaming of water and mojitos so Lisa decided we would do planks on the boards and the first to drop would buy the first round. John wisely decided he would just buy the first round but the remaining three of us did it anyway. It was a little more difficult to plank on that boards because of the current and shifting balance but only a little. The heat was what was getting to me. Being low on the water with no breeze and directly in the sun was almost unbearable. Eventually Lisa gave up and Patricia and I decided to call it a draw between us because we would have died before giving in and then we’d not get mojitos.
From this point on John and Lisa were on the boards like sit-on-top kayaks and they maneuvered around with ease. When John noticed one of Lisa’s shoes was lost (they had been on the back of her board) we started to head back and conduct a search. Eagle-eye John found it floating near the waterfront. Lisa was so grateful she forgave his debt of the first round of mojitos.
The trip back to the dock was uneventful and quick, owing partly to the current. The dismount onto the dock was easy and the attendants were there to help if we needed.
We put up our life jackets and retrieved our clothes and shoes from the locker. We were all as wet as John but only from the sweat that poured out of us. When we got up to the desk to pay they looked it up under my name because it was my license and Wendie had already paid for hers. The total for two boards for just under an hour and two dry bags and locker was $56. Considerably more than the $17.00 we paid for two boards for over two hours in Occoquan. The boards are $20 an hour each, the bags are $3 each and the locker and tax added up to $56. So, if this is to become a habit over the next few years then justifying a board purchase becomes easier. All in all though $28 for an hour on the Potomac on a good board isn’t outrageous and it is Georgetown, after all.
We trekked back to the car and found enough water to prevent death while we went off in search of food and drink somewhere outdoors and downwind from clean people. Patrons smelling like the Potomac aren’t terribly appealing in most eateries. We decided on Nick’s, ordered water, various proteins, and whatever drinks sounded the most refreshing because Nick’s does not serve mojitos. The drinks they do serve are fabulous so they can be forgiven. By the end we still stank but felt restored and happy about our day. Just in time too since Patricia was fast approaching the hangry hour. The storms that had been predicted that afternoon held off until we were all in the car heading home, punctuating our day perfectly.
A few things to note if you paddleboard at the Key Bridge Boat House:
Bring some of cheap flip-flops that you won’t mind losing if they go over and sink for some reason. Bring these in addition to shoes for after.
If you have enough gear to rent a locker don’t rent a dry bag unless you absolutely must have your phone with you. Even then think about how safe you feel if you have to pull the phone out standing on a stick floating on the river.
Bring water. Fiji water in a large, square bottle may ride easier but keeping it between your feet will help.
Plan on a hike. Parking in Georgetown is never easy and if it’s warm enough to be on the water that’s where everyone will be.
It doesn’t get easier but you will get better!
No one took phones on the river so no selfie this week but through the magic of Photoshop I was able to create an accurate depiction of our group. Well, reasonably accurate.
