Bad Mother SUP'rs

When I was a kid the first rule I learned about boats, Jon boats and canoes specifically, is to never stand in them. Bad things happen if you stand in a boat. So when the idea of learning to use a stand-up paddleboard (SUP) came up my inner rebellious child was all for it!

On a picture perfect Saturday we decided to meet at Occoquan Regional Park in Woodbridge. This was the location for our kayak outing but I was the only member of that outing that was in town. I drove myself and the other car took a nice tour of Occoquan before calling me to find out where they were and how to get to me. I said if the jumped in the river and swam to the right about half a mile they’d get there.

The other car held Patricia and special guests Wendie and Kent. Wendie, it turns out, was a SUP instructor and racer in Australia. This was an unexpected stroke of luck and as it turns out, the saving grace of the entire expedition.

We wandered to the little kiosk and asked for four paddle boards. They only have three so we made Wendie rent a kayak. It made sense since she would be out there instructing us and, naturally, she races kayaks too.

The next challenge was with paddles. They have one. Not one for each board but one for three boards. Somehow I got the one and Kent and Patricia got canoe paddles. Now, we didn’t know enough to understand the difference but a proper SUP paddle is shaped with a bend towards the front. It’s also adjustable so it can be made much longer or shorter depending on if you’re standing or kneeling. A canoe paddle is short, very short. Having no choice we went on with our adventure.

The SUP has a handle in the center, right on the balance point. It’s built in to the board so it’s not too hard to carry the fourteen foot log, fifty pound board a short distance. There will be some 3 Stooges moments when you turn to talk to someone or look at something and the board swings around but there were no serious injuries. The boards themselves looked like they had a few encounters with solid objects anyway.

We put the boards on the shore and about half in the water and our lesson began. Wendie spent about 30 minutes going over the equipment and explain that the handle is a great point to keep our bodies as it is where the board is most balanced. She showed up the proper form to paddle with a proper paddle. The movement is subtle, there’s no real “digging-in” like with a kayak or canoe, but the primary source of power comes from the movement of your midsection. Your shoulders guide and help and get tired but when it’s done right you should feel your obliques fire.

With that and good instruction from Wendie on how to turn and stop we were ready to kneel and stroke. It initial sensation is a bit unstable but we had been told that the boards are very stable as long as we don’t panic. We got the hang of the boards pretty quickly even though our strokes needed work. Now it was time to learn to stand.

Wendie demonstrated the position to start in. She wasn’t sure what to call the position so Kent suggested “doggie-style” We decided on “all fours”. Either term paints a picture that the goal is to lower your center of gravity and spread your weight out over the board.

She then showed us how to bring up our left foot and then the right while keeping our hands planted. Also how to reverse that move. This was a technique to practice since it’s the panic recovery technique if we started feeling unstable.

Once your feet are under you it’s just a matter of standing up. We practiced going all the way up and then dropping again to make sure we could recover and the technique works well.

Once we were standing I was surprised how stable it felt. There was a little wobbling here and there but overall it felt easy. We paddled in the local area and practiced turning and reversing and occasionally practicing our recovery. We all did well but at one point I heard an enormous splash and that was the last we saw of Kent. No, not really. Once he got back to shallows he had no issues getting back on and staying on. He said he didn’t even feel unstable, just suddenly he was in the water.

As we got better we got a bit cocky and decided to do pushups on the boards. It was much easier than it sounds since the position if more stable than standing. We discussed burpees but those will have to wait for another day.

Wendie gave us some challenges like paddling to a point and turning back. All good drills. We then decided to take our new skill out and do some exploring. We traded off the long SUP paddle so everyone had some time with it and I couldn’t believe the difficulty of trying to use the short paddle. I stayed on my knees.

By now my legs, which had run 6 miles of hills earlier in the day, were getting tired and even being on my knees was tough. We had been out about two hours. We headed back in and took our selfie with Wendie “Mermaiding” across the boards.

In the end we had been gone rover two hours and paid $8.50 each except coach Wendie who paid $10.50 for the kayak.

Afterwards we took our sundrenched skin and smelly bodies to Occoquan

for drink and food and stories. All in all a great day out on a budget.

We all agreed this is something we could do on a regular basis. So if anyone is selling their boards cheap drop us a line!